Today I did not do the one thing I wanted to more than anything in honor of this Valentine's Day. I did not throw myself a pity party.

Actually, I woke up 20 minutes early this morning and did yoga.

I made a promise to myself today. Today I would not listen to a single sad song (no matter how much effort it took to hit skip when I'm Tired of Being Alone by WRENN came on), I would not eat one bite of salad, I would not watch Dear John or The Vow, and I would not feel sorry for myself. Today I was going to show myself nothin' but love.

So this morning I did what usually makes me feel like a total BA and I dressed in all black from head to toe. I then went to my political science class and aced my exam (even though I forgot I had this exam until 11 o'clock last night). I took myself to lunch and yes, I did eat as many tater tots as I wanted to. (which was a lot)

If you guys haven't read Eat Pray Love yet I would highly reccomend it. Elizabeth Gilbert is such a likable and funny author.

After my fine arts class and my meeting with my academic advisor (which mostly involved me asking this man if I should do the poetry or fiction track within my major and him giving me a ten minute long answer without actually answering me), I took myself to one of my favorite coffeeshops in San Marcos for a coffee date where I sipped my white mocha, wrote most of this blog post, read Eat Pray Love, and tried to not get too overwhelmed by the sudden urge to drop everything and catch the next flight to Italy.

So truth be told, I have been pretty hard on myself this month. Well, more so than usual. My head has had this record that's been playing the phrase "you're not good enough!!" on repeat at like max volume. Usually I'm a fan of listening to songs loud and on repeat, especially I'd Rather Go Blind by Beyoncé, but I got sick of this particular track pretty quick. It had started to take a toll on me emotionally (which wasn't very cool because I'm not that emotionally stable to begin with. @ Life, excuse you) and I was in desperate need of just giving myself a break...so that's exactly what I did.

Today I was my own funny valentine. (despite the fact that I actually have the lamest jokes, second to my dad of course)

I didn't go to the gym today. I ate whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I read poetry and I made poetry and I took a moment to really feel the sun on my skin. My thoughts were good to me and I was good to my thoughts. It was simple and it was good. I was happy.

Today was just peachy.

Self love is therapeutic. Sometimes we get so caught up in loving other people and other things that we forget to love ourselves. It's easy to look in the mirror and point out our flaws and what we lack and it's so much harder to remember the beautiful things about who we are. It's simple things like hearing my friends laugh or seeing their face when they're telling a story and knowing they have no idea how lovely they really are that remind me that we oftentimes can't always see the beauty in ourselves.

One of my favorite poets wrote, "I have learned to speak. I have learned that when I run, I move beautifully...like a chandelier in a hail storm"

I don't know why I think about these lines as much as I do (especially because when I run on the treadmill I know I most definitely do not move beautifully), but something about them just makes me feel good; like I can be beautiful and powerful altogether. I thought about this poem a lot today.

A hot date night with my two hot dates: pizza and channing tatum

It's easy to forget that you don't need someone else to be happy, especially on days like today. Everywhere you look nowadays, the idea that being in a relationship should be a #1 priority is being shoved in your face constantly and it's unhealthy. It has caused a lot of people to think they are less because they do not have more; like we are somehow defined by our relationship status. Being single rocks. Being in a relationship rocks. It all rocks. If you're not dating someone then embrace your independence and freedom rather than criticizing yourself or asking "what's wrong with me?" because there is nothing wrong with you. (well okay, just because you're single doesn't mean there's nothing wrong with you. If you're a serial killer or something then, yes, there might be something wrong with you)

There is so much you can learn from yourself. All you have to do is just take some time for yourself to actually listen.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to curl up on my bed with the heart shaped pizza my parents ordered for me and a bottle of wine and watch Magic Mike because, yeah, I'm my own valentine, but tonight Channing Tatum is more than welcome to take on that role for an hour or two.

Happy Valentine's Day my dudes, I hope yours was full of love (and maybe even those heart shaped boxes of Chick-n-Minis from Chick-Fil-A)

And if you're sitting on your bed reading this while surrounded by used tissues and every Nicholas Sparks movie ever made, don't let the Valentine's Day blues get you down and, in the words of Tom Haverford and Donna Meagle,

"Treat yo self."